To make room for something new we must let go of something old, whether it’s an idea, a feeling, a relationship, a habit, a piece of furniture, clothing, etc. You get the idea. It doesn’t matter if it is tangible or intangible we only have so much room to occupy.
Some things are easier to let go of than others. For some, tangible things hold memories and significance and the thought of letting go of them gives the feeling that they will be lost forever. I struggled with this earlier in my life. Growing up I did not have much that was mine so when I started gathering things they felt like a safety net, that I was relevant. I have since made myself acknowledge when I am holding onto possessions, or buying things to fill a need to be comforted. If I take a minute or five to pause and get present to understand what my true feelings are in the moment and my true purpose, then I allow myself to fill my cart with abandon and then leave it for 24 to 48 hours. If the desire is still there when I go back, then I am in a better position to make a choice that fulfills my desires and most often it leads to me emptying my cart and being grateful for the process. Of course this is easier to do when shopping online than in an actual store so I try to stay out of stores when I am feeling vulnerable. But the good news is you can always take something back if it isn’t what you truly wanted or needed.
Intangible things are harder to let go of because they are often based on an illusion that we have created whether for safety, love or acceptance. There is always some truth interwoven in the illusion but nonetheless my truth is somewhere buried in a circumstance that I have created by choice. The hardest part of this is unraveling myself from the illusion and begin standing in the truth no matter how difficult it may be on myself or those around me. I cannot control how other people will feel or react to my truth, when I spend my time trying to work out how to make it easier for everyone else I have forgotten about myself again. I cannot make anything easier for anyone, they have a choice in all things just as I do. If I am spending my time trying to predict and manage their emotions I am not giving them the opportunity to really see me for I am because once again I am not choosing my truth but rather a variation to please others who may or may not be ok with my choice. I end up not happy with my choice as I have compromised it based on an assumption not the truth.
As I am working on what I want to Manifest in 2017 I am looking back to see what I am avoiding letting go of. It’s a hard look back as 2015 and 2016 were difficult years emotionally but have lead me to a real place of truth and understanding of who I am and a continual process of uncovering old patterns that no longer serve me as an individual or as part of a relationship. Any relationship from my family, friends, partner, clients and those who I am just meeting for the very first time.
My truth is that I am letting go of a 30-year marriage, a relationship that has spanned 35 years and helped me grow into the person I am today. In the letting go process of separating and divorcing over the last 3 years I have experienced heartbreak, sorrow, loss, independence, acceptance, trust in my inner strength, gratitude for all my experiences and compassion for myself and those that I love. I know that as this year unfolds letting go of the final pieces of the life I dreamed of having and letting myself live the life I am choosing every day is the most loving gift I can bravely embody. I’ve let go of perfection and have embraced integrity in all things. I can only live for today as that is all we really have until we reach tomorrow.
I wish us all peace in the letting go and joy in the new!